be patient or my dad wiil kick your ass

As many of you may know, I've sent in my resume for a job in Afghanistan. For those of you who disagree, its ultimately my choice, and none of your business. I'm in a particular situation emotionally and financially that i wouldn't expect anyone to understand. my mind is set, and if given the opportunity, I'm ready to take full advantage.

i woke up around nine this morning. dehydrated with a mild headache. i had a hand full of beers last night, and watched adventureland til about two thirty. at the moment it seemed like a good idea. this morning, not so much. Regardless of my condition, i have a prior commitment in mind. GET MY PASSPORT ASAP. so far, in the past two days I've frequented 2 post offices, twice! I've been scrambling around and they've been no help. This morning again, i pull in to the post office, hoping the passport department would be open. could you guess a no go? they then directed me to another post office on the other side of town (remember I've been in corpus Christi about six months). "near the oil rigs" he said. i remember confusing the brightly lit oil rigs for the skyscrapers downtown. that was the only time I've been on that side of town, one night on the way back from Austin. the weather hasn't been exactly highway friendly this month. its been a south Texans version of cold (about 50 degrees), and wet all over. Fog, Rain, and the cold wasn't gonna stop me. i was on a hunt for the nueces bay post office. i have potentially $100k riding on it, so you can see, i wouldn't normally wake up that early on my day off.

i pull into the post office (yeah i found it pretty quick). anyone my age is either in college, work, or getting their daily dosage of REM in their warm beds. Needless to say I'm the only one under 90. i open the door and hold it open for some elderly ladies to slowly enter. patience is really a virtue, i learned that from my dad. i find a sign. It says "PASSPORTS ROOM 184" with a huge arrow pointing down the hall (I'm guessing they get that asked often). i find the room. its an office of course, travel posters on the wall as well as the many many requirements for a passport. i find a sign in sheet. i sign in. there is one name above mine, and not a human in sight. no employees nor customers. on the desk was another sign, something about an important meeting going on on the other side of the wall and to be quite. i stand around a bit and spot some literature. As i searched i was amazed at the various genres of magazines they had. Kristen Stuart and Robert Pattison were on the cover of BAZAAR. I'm so sick of that teeni bopper induced saga. Kristen is pretty hot though.

its been ten minutes and my patience is diminishing. my soul was the only presence in that half of the building. i walk over to the postal side and kindly let yet another elderly woman in front of me in line. Even though i didn't have a package and i just needed to ask a question i calmly waited. I've learned that as a customer you have to let the employees finish, in return. you'll receive better service. plus i don't need someone to make it any harder for me, because i put them in a bad mood. as the line finishes i waited till she was ready, greeted her and ask "Excuse me ma'am, is the passport department closed?". "no sweetie," she says "just take a seat in the office after the first room, he should be back already". i smile, nod, and thank her before i head to where i came from.

There are now two souls in the office including myself. He is a very light complected man, mid forties maybe. Hes sitting at his desk on the phone, it reminds me of the way my dad sounds when we talk over the phone. to my surprise, hes speaking fluent Spanish. i have no idea why these things surprise me, I'm white and I speak Spanish. He acknowledges me, and i wait some more. when he finishes he calls me in. "what can i do for you?" he asks. his tone is soft and calm. "I'm looking into getting a passport sir, as soon as possible" i confess. he pulls out a sheet of paper with the many many and specific requirements i talked about earlier."you're gonna need these here, and it comes out to this" pointing at the price. i admitted i didn't have all the requirements and that id be having to leave pretty soon maybe not in time for the passport to arrive via snail mail. He looks at me very calmly "that's not a problem, let me show you some different options" he flips over the requirement page and starts jotting things down. he goes on, switching from booklets, to the Internet to my application and back. hes so full of information its hard to keep up, and my microscopic attention span doesn't help any. i do my best to focus on what he is saying, in hopes he doesn't think I'm wasting his time. i cant repeat exactly what he said but he was really showing me some insider points. it turns out, more money=faster process=faster delivery, who would of guessed you could pay off the government to hurry the fuck up. He also informed me about the passport center in Houston, which is only three-four hours away, not only charges the minimum but gets the passport the same day. WOW this fucker is gooood.

Back to my first problem, my birth certificate is back home (the pocket one), regardless, i need the full sized one. he said i could chance it with the pocket one, but my mom is a resident not a citizen, and i don't need anymore delays. its been days of driving, calling and waiting lots of waiting. he pulls out yet another tab on the Internet, you need to talk to the county clerk. DING.(side note: years ago i worked at the hidalgo county's purchasing department, part of my job was to daily retrieve the county clerks signature on loads of paperwork beyond my imagination or care.)
"say, could you get the number for the purchasing department?"i asked. he slightly tilted his head, confused, like an obedient indoor pet. he responds "you have to get it from the county clerk". i tell him " i know, but i used to work at purchasing and everyone is well connected there". as if it was the last piece to a 1000 piece puzzle, his confusion vanished and his head reset to proper posture. "oh i see, you have some friends there" he clicks on the purchasing department link. i can only remember the receptionists name Tanya, because we spent alot of time flirting in her office. to my luck, on loads the names and phone numbers of the ENTIRE staff. the phone rings, and as he talks to whoever is calling, i glued myself to the monitor. the names all too familiar. going one by one reminiscing both their faces, and their offices. i couldn't believe they're all still there. well i guess getting $25/hr to sit in an office from 8-5 Mon-Fri shuffling through paperwork when the boss passed by (pretending to work) plus med, dent, vision, 401k and a retirement plan is not something you'd wanna leave.
hes of the phone now and before i could ask for a printout, he gets up walks to printer and hands it to me. WOW this fucker is gooooood. i almost tip him. i gathered my paperwork, overly thanked him and was on my way.

on the way back home i miss my exit, but find my way to fast food joint. damn I'm starving. the manager is nice, the clerk is nice, overall this has turned out to be indeed a good morning. i get on the phone "is Tanya available?" i ask the anonymous voice on the other end. "one second please", click.....click "Purchasing, this is Tanya, how can i help you?"

we caught up a bit, i explained my situation and without hesitation she offered her help. needless to say IM FEELING FUCKING GREAT. things are good. i wonder if there is a god, cause Ive been so blessed this morning.

anyways ill keep you posted. that's where I'm at so far. things are good, i think i can even smell the hot afghani sand irritating my face..........